I guess the title of today's blog describes where I've been for almost 2 months! Digging deep, reading books, meditating and doing volunteer work at Shambala Mountain Center, focusing on my beautiful daughter and gift, Lily, and being vulnerable:busting my heart wide open. The shift to groundlessness has occured; when I realize nothing is solid, nothing is stagnant, nothing is changeless. What a relief. All that struggle, attachment, high expectations, assumptions, fears...they've loosened their stranglehold grip on me and my mind. They have not totally vanished (goodness, I'm human!), but they've noticeably backed off. I realize I have absolutely nothing to lose, because I don't even own any of it in the first place.
Buddhists believe that we cause our own suffering, samsara, by believing things to be permanent, changeless. Freedom comes from just allowing, being, trusting.
It's nice to be back...but not on solid ground!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
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